VisualCrack

Dir. Jed Weintrob

Cast: Angela Bettis, Kirby Bliss Blanton, Devon Graye, Ben Cotton, Christopher Titus

Scar 3D can only be described as a stab-by-numbers slasher movie, and be warned, that is the first (and last) positive remark I'll probably be able to make in this review. This cinematic abomination is supposedly the first movie to be created in HD-3D, which for all its fancy numbers and letters, basically appears to translate as 'we know the movie's crap, but how cool is this?' answer ... Not Cool!

Imagine a slasher movie in 3D.... Go on, imagine it... What do you see?

Masked killers jumping out of cupboards while easily pleased audiences jump in mock-terror. Knives being swiped in three dimensions. Blood shooting out of the screen. In all honesty, the idea of a 3D slasher movie doesn't sound so bad, why, then, does Scar 3D almost entirely fail to make the most of its fancy technological DNA? Which bright spark decided a torture porn gore-fest was the way to go? Aside from a few neat tricks, there's literally no reason this film was shot in 3D and sadly it is no better in three dimensions than it is in two.

The plot is so abhorrent, so much so I won't bother to repeat it here, but I will warn you that you've seen it a million times on direct to DVD drivel and scrawled in the back of countless film student text books. Young girls, serial killers, torture scenes, not to mention the fact that atrocious acting doesn't exactly sweeten the deal, neither does a script that serves up cliche after cliche, all without even one tongue in one single cheek. Actors are prone to flailing around their arms and projecting theatrically to squeeze every ounce out of the 3D medium, wafting objects towards the camera for added effect but succeeding only in making the film look like some bizarre Halloween pantomime.

Enough about the film: it's a stinker through and through. The 3D tech, though, is another matter. REAL-D, as it's known, is literally an eye opener.Essentially it works, sadly the producers are stuck with the old traditional red/blue ensemble for the DVD release. Roughly translated, what that means is, anything the cinematic experience gained by REAL-D is lost in about 2 minutes of the title sequence ending on DVD, just leaving you with a bad head, sore eyes and having to watch this travesty in "The Flat".

So the result... avoid like the plague... or hope and pray someone can develop a home based Real-D system sooner rather than later... Jim Cameron... I believe that's your job for the Blu-Ray version of Avatar.